Oooooo gee this is AMAZING!!! You guys are sooooo sweet. I've literally never won anything in my life. Literally. That was my first detected psychic power--the ability to never win anything. My first school (public/non-psychic) thought that was weird and put me in a special class to try and teach me to win things but they just couldn't and I started to fall behind in my other studies and that's when my mom pulled me out and put me in Psychic High School.

Now I have my true calling in life--to be an airshipman! Already I'm missing it. The subtle hum of the engines, the tiny corrections of inclination, getting the best churros of my life in Tiwanaku... And I am going to miss all of you so much! Once I graduate and then get my airshipman's license, you're the first ship I'm applying too.

Bye bye! Bon voyage!

Landing at Your School!

Zephyr Air Transport Inc. will be making a one-night stopover at Psychic High School.

Arrival: Wednesday Afternoon

Where: The mooring post at the south end of Subliminal Field.

What: The airship Sadie Hawkins will be taking on much needed supplies and dropping off our interns. Actually just one intern. Singular. @Marni Saylor did an exemplary job assisting in work all around the ship, and the crew liked her so much they've pitched in on a scholarship to go towards Merchant Airshipman's training from the Armstrong Aerialist Academy. It's something we've named The @Marni Saylor Scholarship Foundation.

We wish our other former interns--@Ava Elisabeth and @Louis C.--good luck in their travels, wherever they may be.

Yours,

Captain Alejandro Novak
(The Sky Wolf)
on board the continuous merchant dirigible Sadie Hawkins

I've been so caught up in life on board the Sadie Hawkins that I've been forgetting to post! If I'm not getting greasy with the mechanics keeping the engines humming then I'm climbing around inside the hull checking the gas bags for holes, or crawling on the outside of the dang thing fixing rips or scaring off those crazy monkeys.

When I do get any spare time I just end up staring out at the clouds or the land drifting by below. Painted deserts, emerald rain forests, polar ice fields. I've even got a porthole next to my hammock, though it's kind of blurry.

The main thing to remember when you're part of an airship crew is to follow orders. If you don't - that's how you get left behind. Or worse. When the Chief Rigger says to tie off she means it, because you're going outside and the hull could be icy. Or if the navigator comes over the speaking tube telling you to seal off, it's because we've encountered a flock of migrating vampire micro hyper-bats and they're getting through the vents.

The crew's been super nice: Charming Roger, Elisa and Liesel (the Elevator Twins), @Roman Kandel (who's a rudderman), Cookie, and all the rest. Even the Captain, though he doesn't talk to me much. I think Pidge has to remind him I'm even on board. She's super nice.

Ok but the main question you guys have been asking me: How do toilets work on a dirigible? Are you ready???!!! STRAIGHT DROP. In the daylight you can look down the hole and see all of God's creation just cruising on by, thousands of feet below. Yup. It's true. Just a hole in a bench.

Well that's a scrape the Sadie Hawkins barely got out of, but we lived to tell the tale once more. Landing inside the compound was no easy task, since it's surrounded by massive sharpened posts, each bigger than a telephone pole. Likely all old growth pine. The whole place looks like a cartoon fort from an old western.

We dropped off our shipment--barrels and barrels of Grade A Maple Syrup from the Breakfast Lands. Unfortunately, the people of Pole Town won't be eating it on their flapjacks. Instead, it's the number one weapon in their endless war with the Monkey Pigs.

The Monkey Pigs are crazy for human hair. Word is they're the result of some scientific experiment gone horribly wrong--meddled with their DNA trying to create a race of primate hair dressers that consumed the clippings as they worked. But instead they broke free from the lab and became a bloodthirsty band of hairivores, terrorizing miles and miles of the western wilderness.

But the syrup takes the fight out of them, makes a lasting change in their brain chemistry that turns them into docile lap animals. The syrup also works as a binding agent that makes it easy to roll them into giant balls, suitable for transport. That's messy work, and not a job the Sadie Hawkins will ever take.

Until they're properly subdued, they are a vicious, nasty lot, and they chose their moment for a full-on assault of the compound just as we were lifting off. Monkey Pigs were flying over the walls, occasionally impaling themselves on the massive spikes, the massive cannon pumps firing great streams of maple syrup through the air. Pidge guided the ship through the wild screeches and fangs and torrents of sweet, sweet syrup, up and over the spikes, and away we flew.

I've got to take a recon of the hull. Sticky stuff can jam the fins and rudders and propellers, and more than once I've found a squealing, hair-hungry castaway hanging from the rigging. I think I'll take young @Marni Saylor--the kids always get a kick out of climbing on the outside of the ship when we're aweigh.

Captain Alfonso Chairbreaker
(The Sky Wolf)
Captain of the Continuous Merchant Dirigible Sadie Hawkins

Pidge can see the future. Just a little. It's one of the things that made her so great in the tank. Not like grand visions or anything, She just often knows the next best step ahead, and makes sure to set us up for it. She'll set a course correction, and more often than not we end up avoiding a thunderstorm or discovering a new stop.

Me, I get the amnesia. Not in a grand way either, but will forget some key thing just at the right time. I say "right" because Pidge says it keeps us out of ruts--that we're not anchored to the past. Like those kids we left. What were their names? I wouldn't have remembered except Pidge brought it up at lunch.

Now we're headed into Monkey-Pig territory--the hairy hungry huns who hunger for human hair. I hate those guys. They'll descend on a village and kidnap all but the bald, then take them back to their camps and shave their heads and have a feast. Rough stuff. We'll be landing in a fortified stockade to deliver key supplies. I suppose I should make a landing announcement soon.

Oh wait, what? Is this thing on? I really need to figure out how to change it from "Public Address" mode to "Captain's Log."

Captain Alfonso Chairbreaker
(The Sky Wolf)
Captain of the Continuous Merchant Dirigible Sadie Hawkins

Sometimes I put the ship on autopilot and consider Pidge. My first mate.

Pidge and I go way back. We were tank buddies back in the Trance Wars, and when you spend that much time floating around in the same immersion fluid, sharing the same consciousness, fighting for your mutual survival, you become close.

In the tank she always took the lead, but when the wars ended and we climbed back out into the daylight and saw what the world had become, she was more comfortable with me in the captain's chair. I think I got the better deal.

Right now she's checking the ballast readings on the starboard control panel. They're all vintage dial indicators, so sometimes she taps the glass with her fingernails to make sure they're showing the right weights. We use water for ballast, as well as producing the hydrogen we need through electrolysis. When we get low, Pidge guides us down to a mountain lake, drops the scoops, and buzzes the surface of the water at top speed.

I love watching her work.

We're planning on catching the late afternoon thermals from the endless cornfields today, which means we'll start tearing down on the tents in about an hour. Randall, Little Kimmie, and @Ava Elisabeth, you're on popping corn duty--get those sacks on board! Charming Roger, @Roman Kandel, and @Marni Saylor--we need an inventory count on the enchanted corn husk dolls.

Also, I spoke with the Cornfield Ghosts and they assure me that @Louis C. is so deeply within the corn maze that he won't be joining us at liftoff. Just a reminder that the Sadie Hawkins waits for no one!

Captain Armin Kobad
Captain of the Continuous Merchant Dirigible Sadie Hawkins

Dear diary,

We have landed in Clavus and I have register duty which is quite stressful due to the hoards of Corngiants
And Clavus People buying VHS tapes and Game Boy Games.

On my break, I explored the village and found that they mostly just have Old VHS players and Game Boys and don't really have any other technologies. Also, they have A TON of Miniature Golf Courses . There is like two restaurants, a couple stores, and 59 Miniature Golf Courses! 59 Miniature Golf Courses ! 59!!

They also have tons of mutant plant animals ! So Kaliningrad had a fun time playing with other plants animals.

Tomorrow, I have register duty again , but I am planning
On hiking to a Wart Troll village and exploring after work.

Sincerely,
Ava Elisabeth
INTERN
Zephyr Air Transport Inc.

Oh, I should have mentioned. Corn Mazes are one of my weaknesses.

This evening, the Sadie Hawkins will be making its first landing since leaving Psyhigh. As a night landing it is a little trickier than a daytime landing, and we ask that our intern crew be especially on their toes.

We'll be landing in the small hamlet of Clavus. It's on the edge of Cornfield Country, where the Cornfields of Infinity begin. Just past the Wart Troll lands.

Mostly we're here for the haunted cornhusk dolls, and popping corn. The Clavus people have a thing for old VHS tapes and Game Boy games, and we've got plenty to trade them.

This will be a short stop, either one or two days depending. Everyone will be assigned shifts in the tents. Crew is free to explore Clavus and its surroundings when you're not on duty. Just stay clear of the Corn Mazes. We've got a tight schedule.

Captain Armin Kobad
Captain of the Continuous Merchant Dirigible Sadie Hawkins